Fragment 81 /Winter’s End /Matins /Sun, 30 Aug 1998
/because me and paul have turned them to believe in fortuitous order rising from chaos/ /got them seeking to divine their own futures by wringing their hands at our stars/ /while all along/ /weve just been burning burning burning ourselves/ /with the outpoured cauldrons of unholy loves/ /heavens and earth/ /feeding off each other/ /like one big recycling trap/ /like a black hole getting denser and denser each year/ /with no way out/ /and no light to break in and free us/ /just stars out there receding further and further away/ /and us waiting to be swept away in the flood/ /who is going to pluck me out/
From his now motionless position on the nearly deserted car park, Caul watches his hope of reaching the source of the love needed to restore his life recede with the stars. He sits devastated, hunching his legs under his enfolding arms. Collapsing his back against his car, a serpent enters his mind and slivers through it, each dart of its tongue proclaiming that there is no way out. Everything around him is burning fire, as the first glimmer of grey begins to line the amphitheatre of mountains beyond.
[…] his eyes, Caul realises for the first time hangs upside down and is about to fall out of the sky. The dog star follows at his heels as if to dig up the god’s corpse to make wormwood the fresh waters of the town. Then the stars […]
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